


Katsuki Yuuri, sweetheart, darling, honey, saccharin, maple syrup, crunchy milk pie, KATSUDON

by potatodaniel



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: A Lot of Swearing at the End of the Story, Alternate Universe - High School, Angry Yuri Plisetsky, Auction, Fundraising, M/M, Ring Leader Wannabe JJ, Student Council, Stupid boyfriends, Swearing, bastards
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-14
Updated: 2017-02-14
Packaged: 2018-09-24 11:22:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9722111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/potatodaniel/pseuds/potatodaniel
Summary: “Katsuki Yuuri, sweetheart, darling, honey, saccharin, maple syrup, crunchy milk pie,” JJ addressed him with such names in a low voice while caressing his soft cheek. “Be nice and cute and… Oh! Wonderful and beautiful. Sit and be our saviour this once, mmkay?”-A high school AU for Yuri Plisetsky to yell at.





	

**Author's Note:**

> ITS ACTUALLY RATED MATURE FOR A LOT OF SWEARING BY YURI PLISETSKY

The winter school trip. It had to be that. The one that put Yuuri into this miserable state. He was drenched in his own cold sweats, bathing in the cheap spotlight in the dim lit gym. He was gazing straight ahead. His vision was blurry because his glasses had been taken by the committees, but he knew that the place was crowded. AND. He knew that the eyes of the crowd were staring at him. It was as if they were staring at a merchandise on a display table, a bust on a plinth, an exotic animal in a cage, a bright red cherry on a soft cake or whatever.

He felt a hand placed on the back of his left hand and turned his palm upwards, then something soft and white was put on his palm. He grasped the thing carefully—in the back of his mind, he was afraid that it was one of Phichit’s hamsters. It was a handkerchief, or so it seemed. He immediately brought the cloth up to his forehead to wipe his sweat before setting it down on his lap. He wasn’t looking at the crowd anymore, resolving on dropping his gaze to the wooden floor to lessen the nervousness.

“Here is our next item! The last merchandise of our beloved school’s Winter Auction, Katsuki Yuuri from Class 2-C!” The voice started. The crowd became savage as they roared, shouted and whistled joyfully.

Katsuki Yuuri was doomed.

* * *

Okay. But the idea of auctioning ‘school beauties’ was definitely shortcoming and vacuous. Yuuri didn’t know who bubbled up the idea. Whoever did this definitely needed to bleach their brain thoroughly with holy water. He had suspicion that it was that fool of a Student Council President, Jean-Jacques Leroy, also known as King JJ.

The auction itself was a school tradition. It was held every fall even though the title was Winter Auction. It was the student council’s attempt on fundraising for the upcoming winter school trip in Hokkaido, somewhere a whole goddamn country away from Kyushu. And of course they needed money to get to that place. Somehow, they managed to convince the teachers on the theme of the year’s auction, ‘school beauties’.

Yuuri wasn’t present in the decision making of the auction because he was attending the infamous Going Home Club. Well, he couldn’t help it. He swore to himself he wouldn’t be anywhere near the school ground for any extracurricular activity because he hadn’t finished his second play through of Persona 5. He hadn’t even used a walk through to get past the true ending.

So, two weeks before the auction began, he found his name posted on the announcement board as one of the committees for the infamous Winter Auction of the school. He didn’t even know why his name was there because he wasn’t a student council member. He had to blink, rub his eyes, cleaned his glasses and put them on again, but his name wouldn’t disappear from the poster.

He had no other choice but help the student council after Phichit, his best friend and also the student council’s president of internal affair, told him that the teachers would mark him if he didn’t want to help.

“Can you help the others in the backstage?” Leo asked him when he was busy arranging the papers on the registration desk right beside the large double door that led into the gym where they held the auction.

“But I’m not done yet,” Yuuri said as he put the papers into a folder.

Leo fidgeted suspiciously. He scratched the nape of his neck and wore a weird apologetic smile on his face. Then he offered a hand to him and Yuuri just stared at the hand.

“I will- let me do it. You can go to the backstage.”

Yuuri squinted at him for a moment before sighing and handing the files over to the other boy. He muttered a quiet ‘fine’ before moving his butt. He glanced back at Leo once more as he strode towards the backstage. The auction had neared its end, so he guessed that they needed him to clean up the props.

Phichit, weirdly, welcomed him with tears of joy and a wide smile of relief on his face. Yuuri winced. Something was not right. He could sense it.

“Yuuri, you are my very best friend and our school’s winter school trip messiah!” the tanned boy said as he hugged Yuuri and kissed his cheek.

“Wha-”

Before he could form a word, a hand was placed on his shoulder and turned him around. King JJ immediately came into his sight. A business like smile crept up his face as he placed a hand under Yuuri’s chin. His thumb slowly brushed against Yuuri’s bottom lip, pulled it down slightly before it snapped back into place. He hummed in appreciation and satisfaction. Yuuri raised his eyebrows in confusion.

JJ grabbed his glasses and took it off. Yuuri yelped and tried to retrieve them but JJ raised them up high above his head and Yuuri couldn’t reach for them even by tiptoeing. Damn it.

“Katsuki Yuuri, sweetheart, darling, honey, saccharin, maple syrup, crunchy milk pie,” JJ addressed him with such names in a low voice while caressing his soft cheek. “Be nice and cute and… Oh! Wonderful and beautiful. Sit and be our saviour this once, mmkay?”

Yuuri shuddered from the contact and turned his face away to avoid it. He couldn’t see a damn thing without his glasses and he felt JJ grab his shoulders and turned him back to face Phichit again. He could see Phichit’s fuzzy figure. The Thai boy took his hand and led him out of the backstage—to the stage. Yuuri began to panic and struggled but he felt a few other hands pushing his back. He whined and Phichit apologised all the way to the stage until he was seated on the chair that they were using to display the ‘merchandise’—the ‘school beauties’ that were auctioned.

The hands kept him in place as he tried to push whoever it was—the silhouettes looked like Georgi and Mila to be very honest. When he finally gave up struggling and stayed still on the chair, he sighed in resignation and frowned sadly. He started to sweat uncomfortably and someone put a handkerchief on his hand for him to use.

“Here is our next item! The last merchandise of our beloved school’s Winter Auction, Katsuki Yuuri from Class 2-C!”

The announcement was made by a first year named Minami who was serving as the announcer of the year. The students in the gym started to cheer and whistle shamelessly. Yuuri clutched the white handkerchief in his hand. At this rate, no one could save him. Not even his boyfriend who was currently studying diligently in the library, working hard for the university entrance exam. The platinum haired upperclassman had told him earlier that day that he couldn’t visit him the whole day because the exams had been piling on him.

“A rare Japanese beauty with sweet appearance and personality that we all adore and cute bubble butt-”

Yuuri flinched at the description.

“He is not in the catalogue for some confidential reason.”

Yuuri slightly tilted his head. It was true, his name wasn’t even written in the said catalogue for Winter Auction. Ah, damn. He knew it. He knew something was off. He was definitely tricked into joining the committee while the true intention was to secretly auction him.

“The sweetheart, darling, honey, saccharin, maple syrup, crunchy milk pie of one of the best straight As students and the ex-President of the Student Council, His Royal Highness Prince Victor Nikiforov from Class 3-A who’s probably being a total geek in the library as we speak.”

Well, that script must be written by JJ. There was no mistake.

“But here he is today in the Winter Auction as one of our valuable merchandises! As we informed at the beginning of every transaction, our rule is that the purchased ‘school beauty’ will be your date for a week, you can do anything, treat them good at the very least or treat them best. No treating your purchase with violence or without consent. Everything is under the surveillance of the teachers and the Student Council. That said. Raise your hand for the bid! It starts with… will it be higher than Guang Hong Ji from Class 1-D? O-oh, gosh, I wish I had at least that amount for my pocket money so I could purchase the sweet and cute Katsuki Yuuri, but sadly not,” the announcer sniffled. The other students booed. Minami continued, “Okay, so it starts with… 7500 yen.”

The students gasped at the amount. It was the highest starting bid so far. There was no way a high school student owned that amount of money for a mere week of dating Katsuki Yuuri. Well, unless it was—

“10.000 yen,” a voice shouted from the audience.

Yuuri recognised the voice. The boy probably already left the backstage and returned to his ‘king seat’ in front of the stage. Yuuri sighed again.

“Wow! 10.000 yen right off the bat from our honourable Excellency, the current Student Council President, Mr. Jean-Jacques Leroy from Class 2-A!” Minami announced excitedly. “Is there anyone who’s going to beat that absolutely high first bid? Come on, guys! It’s for Katsuki Yuuri.”

The gym was met with silence for a moment before another student raised a hand and shouted. “I will sell my kidney for a week of dating Katsuki Yuuri! 10.500 yen!”

“Alright, 10.500 yen! Anyone else?”

The other students started to show their courage by bidding a bit higher.

“11.000!”

“11.050!”

“12.000!”

“12.001!”

“15.000!”

“20.000!”

“Another bid from King JJ! 20.000 yen!” Minami said.

It turned silent once more. Then the sound of running feet and slamming door were heard the next second.

“Come on guys, if you want Katsuki Yuuri to be your date, you need to bid higher,” he added.

“50.000.”

Silence. Yuuri was taken aback. And even without being able to see it, he knew that the majority of people in the gym were scandalised, Minami gawked and JJ’s smirk was louder than anything. All of them probably turned their heads to the source of the voice. Yuuri could feel his eyes turned warm and he almost sobbed. He could hear his prince coming, on his soft furred poodle that looked like a tall white horse and in his glorious school uniform that looked like a polished luxurious designer suit that fit his perfectly sculptured body. He clutched the handkerchief in his hands and bring it to his fluttering chest. He breathed in relief.

Minami made a surprised noise before announcing, “Ah… 50.000 yen from the best student of the year and also the ex-President of the Student Council, Mr. Victor Nikiforov from Class 3-A! I think it’s fin-”

“51.000!” a voice interrupted.

“Okay. 51.000 yen from King JJ…”

“70.000!”

Victor glared at the boy who was standing beside him, the one who fetched him from the library earlier, bringing him the news about the auction. Victor thought that he was his ally. He gritted his teeth behind those heart shaped lips that were pressed into a thin line. The other boy only grinned sheepishly.

“Um… Woah! Unbelievable! What kind of battle is this? 70.000 yen from the ex-Vice President of the Student Council and the right hand man of Mr. Victor Nikiforov, Mr. Christophe Giacometti from Class 3-A!” The rest of the students gasped.

“75.000.” Yuuri could hear the wide smirk in that one, he was worried.

“75.000 yen from King JJ again!”

“100.000.” Victor’s deep voice echoed all over the place. It was a music to JJ’s ears.

The first year announcer repeated the amount, then he counted to ten and no one else raised their voice. He ended the auction with a nervous smile.

“No further bid? The last merchandise goes to Mr. Victor Nikiforov for 100.000 yen!”

The crowd cheered.

“Mr. Nikiforov, you can sign the documents and finalise your purchase in the backstage. We accept both cash and transfer to the bank account of the Student Council. Remember our rules, terms and conditions. The auction is under the surveillance of the teachers and the Student Council and-”

* * *

“What the fuck?! What gives?! In which fucking God’s name?! Are you fucking insane?! You bought your own boyfriend for 100.000 fucking yen! Are you fucking nuts?! You are definitely tricked by that motherfucking JJ shit, you imbecile! That bitch knew your pocket was deep, and now you’re fucking 100.000 poorer because you’re so goddamn stupid!” Yuri Plisetsky, Victor’s first year cousin, called him names and shouted at him.

Victor just pouted and hid behind his shorter and smaller boyfriend. Yuuri felt awkward being a shield like this, but this angry Yuri wouldn’t let go of his boyfriend’s stupidity. He actually felt stupid himself for falling into the Student Council’s trap.

“But Leroy almost purchased Yuuri! If Chris hadn’t called me and I hadn’t bid really high, he would have his hands on Yuuri!” Victor reasoned, grabbing his boyfriend’s hips and pulling him closer to his chest.

“For fuck’s sake! Are you really the best fucking student in the whole fucking school? Just let him have this fucking stupid katsudon, he won’t give a shit about him, JJ is a fucking hetero! He is all over that Isablahblah girl for all I know. You’re just a stupid fuck falling into an ankle deep trap hole that shitty ring leader wannabe visibly dug in front of your motherfucking rotten eyes!!”

“But Yuuri!”

Yuri spat. “Whatever. I guess there’s no use reasoning with stupid couple. Next year, when I take over the Student Council President seat, I will have his ugly ass pay everything back. Just you watch!” He walked past Yuuri and stopped to give Victor a kick on his shin and then walked away from the couple.

Yuuri sighed in annoyance and faced his boyfriend. He touched the taller boy’s cheek.

“Yuuri~” his boyfriend mumbled before lurching forward to hug him tight by his small waist and nuzzling his face in the crook of Yuuri’s neck.

“Victor…” Yuuri covered his reddened face with both of his hands. He thought back on what Yuri told them just then. _We are so stupid._ “I want to die.”


End file.
